The Unified People´s Republic of Crilland is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Lucius Izunia with an even hand, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, prohibition of alcohol, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate population of 7.89 billion Crills are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Veridia. The average income tax rate is 94.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Crillandian economy, worth a remarkable 1,113 trillion Green Paper Rectangles a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Tourism, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 141,136 Green Paper Rectangles, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Unsolved crimes are often pinned on veterans with PTSD, schoolboys who turn to watch pretty girls go by are given detention, drills and shovels have been banned as the government cracks down on any means of fracking, and internet ads promising "hot singles in your area" are even less accurate than they used to be. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Crilland's national animal is the Chainsaw Man, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Church Of Money.

Crilland is ranked 279,141^st in the world and 5,846^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -326.89 on the Scary Big Number Scale.