The United Kingdom of The Teddy is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Teddy the Great with a fair hand, and renowned for its smutty television, complete lack of prisons, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 22.483 billion Teddians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, corrupt morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Defense, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bearia. The average income tax rate is 98.3%.

The powerhouse Teddyian economy, worth a remarkable 3,153 trillion Ted Rings a year, is highly specialized and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 140,261 Ted Rings, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government sends submarines to retrieve bodies from shipwrecked submarines, party-lovers often change religions just for the weekend, the consent form for routine blood pressure measurement has been nominated for the 'Novel Of The Year' award, and teen parties are often ruined by wet blanket chaperones. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Teddy's national animal is the Great Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Great Grand Church of the Teddy.

The Teddy is ranked 273,074^th in the world and 5,658^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -259.88 on the Scary Big Number Scale.