The Holy Blue Lucky Nation of The Tony Paporordia is a massive, genial nation, ruled by AARaider with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, ubiquitous missile silos, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, cynical population of 3.14 billion Tony Paporordians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lion City. The average income tax rate is 74.9%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Tony Paporordian economy, worth 441 trillion Gold Bars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 140,687 Gold Bars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.9 times as much as the poorest.

Grocery stores can be audibly identified by the giggling emerging from them, social networking sites have discussion groups devoted to planning terrorist attacks, AARaider's former secretary was last sighted on her new yacht, and only adults may purchase violent video games. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Tony Paporordia's national animal is the Lion, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Neo-Violetism.

The Tony Paporordia is ranked 282,054^th in the world and 5,965^th in The North Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -371.98 on the Scary Big Number Scale.